Our Entire Country is at Stake*

First, he groped women because “as a celebrity, we can do whatever we want”. He admitted he lusted for his own daughter.

He made international deals that have padded his and his friends $$ pockets, while destroying our world wide reputation. He has used our military to aid the Russian president in destroying neighboring countries in a massively egocentric desire to recreate the USSR.

He has sold off sacred native lands for oil.

He has incited racists, homophobes, womanizers, and mass shootings.

Now…

In 2020, he ignored the warnings of the covid19 pandemic, plummeting our country into crisis with more per capita deaths than anywhere else on the entire planet.

And now he wants the uninsured working class to get back to work, despite the risks. Because economic growth is more important than lives.

When American’s witnessed the murder of George Floyd, we became sick with grief and were outraged.

His solution? He wants all departments of the armed military forces to squash the protesters who are sick of police brutality, especially against the blacks. He had these forces use rubber bullets and tear gas so he could cross the street for a photo op.

Are we going towards a fascist regime? The END of America? A policed country? My own husband believes that the country will finally crash and become a Dictatorship. I disagree.

I’m proud of our protesters who risk their lives to say we are not going to be quiet anymore. And if you think our country is going to be intimidated by more police brutality, think again.

The response to clear racial profiling by our police forces has been intense, I know. But as my son observed:

“This is what the END of the Rope looks like.”

I know I simply can not stay silent knowing that we are in a real crisis– and it has to end.

Please don’t forget.

November is far away, but we have to remember who put us here. Yes. It’s the man posing as our President.

We have to vote against him with whoever will end his reign.

I’m not for or against the Republican Party, but I am against this individual — who has, nearly single handily, worked to destroy our country’s values as a fair and open society, with respect and true consideration for all living beings.

I want to see our country as progressive leaders again.

* at “stake” : a risky action where things of value can be gained or lost. 

3 Steps to Master Self-Love

Self-love, or compassion, involves treating yourself kindly, especially in the face of setbacks and disappointments. Learn to say to yourself: “This is really difficult right now. How can I comfort and care for myself in this moment?”

Self-compassion involves self-kindness through recognizing  that all human beings are imperfect and make mistakes. Don’t scold yourself in a way that you would never do to another human being!

The following are three ways to help you begin to shift from self-criticism to the practice self-compassion.

1.  Start to pay attention to your inner-dialogue.

The first step in any behavioral change is to develop an awareness of the behavior itself. Begin paying attention to the things that you frequently say to yourself. Write them down for greater clarity.

Choose  a time during the week when you experienced a strong emotion. Write down the specific thoughts you were having. What were your judgements about yourself?

2.  Practice  speaking kindly to yourself.

People will  say things to themselves that they would never say to someone they love. Practice speaking kindly and gently to yourself, especially during times of stress or when you have made a mistake. If you are struggling to be kind, try looking at a photo of yourself  as a child. Try to think about how you would respond to a child or loved one who was struggling or having a difficult time.

3.   Create a list of ways for you to self-care.

Learn relaxation strategies. Schedule self-care into your calendar. “What would feel nourishing or calming to me in this moment?”.

 

 

Freedom is One Question Away…

If it’s true that the brain creates 3 thousand thoughts per minute, doesn’t it make sense that many of them aren’t even true?

Write one down. Take a break. Come back to it later and ask yourself, “Is it true?” Wait for the answer.

You may break out into a Big Smile… you might even laugh.

Experience the instant freedom!

Here are some examples:

* She’s hates me, so I must be a bad person.*

She hates me.

Is it true?

No. She seems upset, but it’s unlikely that she hates me.

I’m a bad person.

Is it true?

No. I have a lot of great qualities. I’m not perfect though. I’m ok with that, so, no. I am not a bad person”.

* I can’t get through this — this is killing me *

This is killing me.

Is it true?

It’s not true – this is uncomfortable but I won’t die.

Letting Go Of the Past to Appreciate the Present

Suffering doesn’t make us grow –

but what we do with our feelings could make us grow. ⚡️💡

dreamstime_m_43975880

It’s an interesting saying though. Where did it come from?  Perhaps it’s because anguish and acute awareness sometimes occur near one another, in time and space.

For me, however, what makes us grow is understanding our feelings, questioning the thoughts behind them, seeing the cause-and-effect of it all, and mindfully letting go.

If we utilize this information the next time these feelings arise (anger, sadness, depression, confusion, fear), we can remember the awareness, the ‘aha’ moment, or insight we discovered before. We can  notice that what we are experiencing in the here and now is separate from the past, and know that our reactions don’t really apply in the current situation. Awareness sets us free to respond differently.

contemplation

Uncomfortable feelings are nearly always preceded by a stressful thought, and when the feelings come, we can isolate the stressful thought, idea, or assumption and question it thoroughly.

I find journaling a powerful aid here. Just write your rambling thoughts about a situation that made you uncomfortable (in your mind or in reality – doesn’t matter). Then let it set. You probably will already feel better because the act of writing is cathartic. But for true growth to occur, go back later and read what you wrote. Pretend you are a scientist!  Your job is to (compassionately) dissect your writing to find the threads of connection…

Try asking these questions:

1. Have I ever felt this way before? Are there any other similarities?

Personal example:   I had to  go to my son’s junior high school to deliver his medicine.   I noticed I had a racing heart, a sense of urgency to complete the task, and an overall sense of shame and dread.

It made no sense in my logical mind.

 Have I ever felt this way before? Are there any other similarities? 

Junior high was very scary for me. I was picked on by other girls and I was even beaten up a number of times. The threats often occurred when students were moving from one class to their next, so I was especially scared when that bell rang!

2.  What were the beliefs / thoughts around the event? 

Awareness: my heart is racing; I have a sense of urgency and intense fear.

THOUGHTS:  I Visualize being attacked. “If I can become unnoticeable, I might make it… Hopefully the bell won’t ring!”

Once we gently meet our past with understanding, we can separate those experiences and respond to the present authentically.

By listening, compassionately, to your own mistaken, innocent mind, you can become free… from this,  then that,  then…