Remember for the first time you experienced something amazing? Was it brought on by something you’d call beautiful? and sacred? I think an experience of awe and wonder is the essence of true intimacy.
We can have a deeper intimacy with the world and ourselves if we can learn to be in wonder, again, of the incredible experience of being here… Right Now!
Say it with me…..
“We are born to love,” writes anthropologist and author of Why We Love, Helen Fisher. “That feeling of elation that we call romantic love is deeply embedded in our brains.”
Our culture can be pretty suspicious about the prospect of romantic love enduring over time and through obstacles, and for good reason. Roughly 50 percent of marriages end in divorce, with 2.4 million U.S. couples splitting in 2012. And among those that stay together, marital dissatisfaction is common. In long-term partnerships that do succeed, romantic love tends to fade into companionship and a love more akin to friendship than to that of a couple in love.
But no matter how cynical we are about the prospect of life-long love, it still seems to be what most Americans are after. Romantic love is increasingly viewed as an essential component of a marriage. One study reports that 91 % of women and 86 % of American men say that they would not marry someone with whom they were not in love. Even if the other person had every other quality they wanted in a partner.
And romantic love is good for both our marriages and our health. Free from the craving and obsession of the early stage of falling in love (I call this the endorphin stage) – research shows it’s correlated with marital satisfaction as well as individual self-esteem and well-being.
Research psychologists who study love, marriage and relationships have pinpointed a number of factors that contribute to long-lasting romantic love.